The warder and the priest come before dawn to rouse me from shivering non-sleep. Heads shaved, barefoot, we are pushed from the gaol into the shadow of the cathedral. My fellow murderers are both men. The thin grey one rubs… Continue Reading
I’m running through the airport with a floppy Christmas cactus in one arm and yanking a rolling suitcase with the other. Neither of which are mine. The owner of both, a fortyish woman with a scarf, chases me. Shouting, “Hey!… Continue Reading
It’s clear that no one would ever willingly drink it, but there’s no consensus on why. “It won’t be the same,” Count Orlok complains. “It’s disgusting. Mortals ruin everything.” He’s been in a foul mood ever since the TSA confiscated… Continue Reading
To the Sorely Mistaken Acquisitions Department of the Big Box Department Store: A certain line of baby products you are selling has come to my attention, and let me tell you, I am not happy. I have been informed that… Continue Reading
He filled his seat at the table as though poured into it. Sprawled out in front of him was a book of crosswords. At 8:45 every morning he sat at his place and pondered over a crossword while the coffee… Continue Reading
When we opened Jamal up, the parasite was gone. An alarming discovery that left our surgical team dumbfounded. The ramifications hit us concurrently. From the limited information the military had shared, we knew it required a warm-blooded host. As we… Continue Reading
[Sleep Today: 5.3 hours | Average: 7.2 hours] + [Coffees Today: 3 | Average: 4] + [Constraint: 33 minutes until scheduled dinner at 154 Hampton Avenue] : Best Match : Premium Sponsor 753. Directive: Play ad 753.1198 and route past… Continue Reading
Gaz rings and tells me he needs a lift — he’s out near St Andrews and he’s hit a kangaroo with his car. “It’s a write-off,” he says. I roll my eyes and leave a half a can of beer… Continue Reading
Posted on December 5, 2023 by Wife of Devoted Packer Fan / 3 Comments I’ve been making sugar cookies for my husband Bob since I was a seventeen-year-old blushing bride, pregnant with what would have been our first child. I… Continue Reading
Fifteen years and three children ago, George met Dorothy #1 at the wedding of a friend. Theirs is a relatively happy marriage, rather unremarkable, the matrimonial equivalent of vanilla ice cream, no sprinkles. Predictable, reliable. He works as a tax… Continue Reading