I was seven. That’s not right. I had just had the water balloon birthday party, so it was late summer of 1999. I was nine. The sun had started its dive into the cornfield-covered horizon and my stomach was full… Continue Reading
Impatient. That’s the first word most people use to describe me. My friends always tease me for how easily annoyed I get when waiting for our food at a restaurant. Well, they would tease me. When I was alive that… Continue Reading
A brunette and her twin girls did their best to ignore me after I reached the highest point in my local California state park. I stood a few feet away from them while I tried to minimize my excessive huffing… Continue Reading
“Wow, it really is you,” the little girl’s expression was almost comical, “you look just like you do in the movies!” Princess Nella chuckled. “Yes, fair maiden. It is I, the real Princess Nella, and I just adore your gown!”… Continue Reading
It always began and ended in the same way. May heralded the end of the college semester with heartfelt goodbyes, posted grades, and celebratory cocktails. June brought slumber with no alarms, lazy snacking, and beachy reading. But July tapped at… Continue Reading
DA: If I lose my wisdom, will my foolhardiness die with it? Doc: Excuse me? DA: If I lose my wisdom, will my foolhardiness die with it? You know, ying-yang, can one exist without the other? Doc: Ha-ha, I get… Continue Reading
“But Da, I don’t wanna this week.” “Ye have to. It’s Sunday.” “I don’t feel well.” “Don’t be daft. Yer goin, John Paul. Ye need to be there.’’ “It’s J… P,” I snapped back. John Paul is for the Pope… Continue Reading
Step right up, folks! Get one of my Patented Seeds of True Randomness before it’s too late! When the Appetites manifest, only those capable of true randomness will survive. Those of you relying on pseudo-random algorithms will be sniffed out… Continue Reading
“This used to be a pirate’s cove, you know.” The water lapped against the side of the boat as the old man lifted the oars out of the water, resting his arms. The boy looked up from the golden wrapped… Continue Reading
Honey, I’m going vegan. That’s right, I’m turning over a new leaf. (Even my puns are plant-based, now.) You cringe. “Are you sure that’s a good idea? Especially now?” Don’t worry, you don’t have to “go” with me. And why… Continue Reading