>>ERROR PRINTER JAM • by Calen MacDonald

To: jkroger@IT.sandoroelec.com
From: cdavis@sales.sandoroelec.com
Subj: Urgent Printer Issue

Dear Jeff,

I’ve been trying to print my weekly report all day but every time I try to my computer reads >>ERROR PRINTER JAM. Mr. Boisey has been bugging me to get this report in so I’d really appreciate it if you could check the issue out soon. He says I can’t leave for the day until it’s in his mailbox.

Thanks,

Chris Davis
Sales Operative
Sandoro Electronics

To: cdavis@sales.sandoroelec.com
From: jkroger@IT.sandoroelec.com
Subj: Re: Urgent Printer Issue

Hey Chris,

That’s a no-can-do unfortunately. Anwesha already asked me to check out the printer this morning. Turns out, somebody left a hand in there! Can you believe it, a whole ass hand in the paper tray! There’s irresponsible and then there’s just damn reckless. Anyways that makes this an HR issue, so I’d take it up with Linda.

You wanna grab a drink after work?

Jeff

To: lherring@HR.sandoroelec.com
From: cdavis@sales.sandoroelec.com
Subj: Fw: Re: Urgent Printer Issue

Dear Linda,

Per my correspondence with Jeff, I’m searching for a solution to this printer issue. Can’t you just take the hand out of the paper tray?

Thank you,

Chris Davis
Sales Operative
Sandoro Electronics

To: cdavis@sales.sandoroelec.com
From: lherring@HR.sandoroelec.com
Subj: Re: Fw: Re: Urgent Printer Issue

Hello Christopher!

This is coming directly from corporate: only the owner of the hand is allowed to unjam the printer. The employee handbook clearly states “employees should not remove the personal property of other employees from the break room.”

A couple people have come in to claim the hand so far. Anwesha from accounting did the best job. She kept her left hand in her back pocket the whole time so I couldn’t tell if she was really missing a hand or not. I offered her a double high five though and she fell for it.

If you can prove the hand is yours then I’ll let you remove it, but until the real owner steps forward I can’t move it in good conscience.

Best,

Linda Herring

To: hboisey@management.sandoroelec.com
From: cdavis@sales.sandoroelec.com
Subj: Fw: Re: Fw: Re: Urgent Printer Issue

Dear Mr. Boisey,

As you can see from this email chain, the printer has been nonfunctional all day. Is it all right if I print my weekly report on Monday instead? As I told you last week, today is my daughter’s birthday and I’d like to be home before she goes to bed.

Thank you,

Chris Davis
Sales Operative
Sandoro Electronics

To: cdavis@sales.sandoroelec.com
From: hboisey@management.sandoroelec.com
Subj: Re: Fw: Re: Fw: Re: Urgent Printer Issue

Chris,

It’s not my fault if the printer isn’t working. You should have anticipated this issue and printed the report yesterday. I don’t want to see you leave your desk unless it’s to put your report in my mailbox. You can celebrate your daughter’s birthday next week.

Get to work,

Harold Boisey
Regional Manager
Sandoro Electronics

“A chain is only as strong as its weakest link” – Harold Boisey

To: asabri@accounting.sandoroelec.com
From: cdavis@sales.sandoroelec.com
Subj: Paper Cutter

Dear Anwesha,

I haven’t been down to accounting in awhile, do you still keep that big paper cutter on your desk?

Thanks,

Chris Davis
Sales Operative
Sandoro Electronics

To: cdavis@sales.sandoroelec.com
From: asabri@accounting.sandoroelec.com
Subj: Re: Paper Cutter

Hey Chris,

Yeah I still have it! You can come by and use it if you need to.

See you then,

Anwesha

To: lherring@HR.sandoroelec.com
From: cdavis@sales.sandoroelec.com
Subj: Fw: Re: Fw: Re: Fw: Re: Urgent Printer Issue

Linda,

Please pardon any mistkes in my spellng. I’d like to collect the hand that was in t paper tray earlier today. I can prove that it is mine as i am cllearly missing my right hand.

Chris Davis
Sales Operative
Sandoro Electronics

To: cdavis@sales.sandoroelec.com
From: lherring@HR.sandoroelec.com
Subj: Re: Fw: Re: Fw: Re: Fw: Re: Urgent Printer Issue

Hi Christopher,

Nice try but the hand in the printer is a left, not a right.

Best,

Linda

To: lherring@HR.sandoroelec.com
From: cdavis@sales.sandoroelec.com
Subj: Re: Re: Fw: Re: Fw: Re: Fw: Re: Urgent Printer Issue

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Calen MacDonald is an undergraduate student in Atlanta, Georgia. He wants to make people laugh at things they’re not sure they can laugh at.


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