Part 1
Sarah: So, Rich, you know how you’ve been obsessing over bedposts lately? Well, it gave me an idea for a story. This is gonna be great, I swear.
Rich: What’s gonna be great? And I wouldn’t say obsessed. I mean, I’m interested. You know, normally interested.
Sarah: I thought I would let you be the star of my latest flash.
Rich: Um, Sarah, this isn’t going to be one of those —
Sarah: Oh yes, it is. You’re going to love it. I swear.
Rich: I don’t think so…
Sarah: I’ll tie you to the bedposts.
Rich: Okay.
Sarah: All I need you to do is put on this dark wig, because your hair is too light, you know? Hey, do you know any Spanish? I need you to talk like Che.
Rich: I’m not wearing a wig.
Sarah: Fine, no wig. But do you know any Spanish endearments? Or curses?
Rich: Listen, I think I better just be moving along
Sarah: Just call out in Spanish when I pour on the chocolate.
Rich: The what? Do what?
Sarah: Yeah, you’re right. Proper chocolate ganache should really be too thick to pour. I could spoon it on.
Rich: Okay.
Part 2
Che: Dios Mio! What are you doing to me, Precious Flower? Untie my hands, I beg of you.
Precious Flower: You are standing tall and proud, my Revolutionary Hero! You do not need your hands with so many other extraordinary appendages for my tasting delight! Here, let me spoon some chocolate ganache on to your willing —
Che: AIEEE! Too hot, too hot!
Precious Flower: Oops!
Part 3
Sarah: Oh, hell. I forgot the beret! Che has to have his beret. Richard, here, put this —
Rich: I’m not wearing a beret. And it’s your turn to get tied to the bedposts.
Sarah: My turn? What?
Rich: Don’t worry. I’ll be gentle.
Sarah: Maybe you could make a slip knot, something like that. Just not a square knot. Square knots are hard to —
Rich: Here, bite down on this.
Sarah: Wait a minute! I didn’t gag you!
Part 4
Rich: This is good. Dark and luscious.
Sarah: I added a tiny bit of cinnamon and nutmeg.
Rich: What else?
Sarah: Honey. Heavy cream. Bittersweet chocolate. A bit of butter. A vanilla bean. Stir it real slow. Yum.
Sarah Black is a fiction writer.
